1. Don't pick your nose with an awl

2. Don't fart in elevators

3. Umbrellas are useless in a meteor shower

4. Don't run around in a field with a lightening rod

5. Don't dive head first into puddles

6. Breathe regularly

7. Blink when you need too

8. Beware of falling bridges

9. Don't pick your teeth with a wire hanger

10. A candy bar you find half eaten on the ground should be left right where you found it

11. Floss, but not with rope

12. If you gotta go, go before your bladder bursts

13. Tying a towel around your neck doesn't make you able to fly

14. If a box of cereal has been sitting in the back of the cupboard for a long time, examine it closely before eating.

15. Don't jump off the neighbor's dock without checking for rocks or anchors

16. Don't walk up behind someone holding a tennis ball and racket

17. Never try to see how slow you can ride your bike before it falls over

18. Never run full steam into a sliding glass door

19. Don't make your brother/sister so mad he/she throws a hammer at you

20. Don't play with nuclear weapons. Countries can get hurt.

21. Don't stay outside and keep playing after you've fallen through the ice

22. Don't laugh in the face of danger if he's big and ticked off

23. Leave the windows up when going through the car wash